Friday, 17 December 2010

Office Party

Just a few hours left until daughter #3 breaks up for Christmas, which means it’s my last proper working day of the year. If I had a real job I figure this would probably be the day of the Office Party, so in order not to miss out this year I have decided to host my own. In honour of the occasion I have put on an extra squirt of perfume and a jumper with a minimal amount of bobbling, and am preparing to crack open a tub of Marks and Spencers’ Christmas Soup. I shall then give a short speech, thanking myself for all my effort this year (glossing over the horribly missed deadline in April. Or was it originally meant to be February?) and inciting myself to further endeavour in 2011. I might even drain the last inch of red wine left in the bottle by the cooker and make a toast to all of you lot, who buy my books, say nice things about them, continue to visit this blog even though I'm rubbish at keeping it updated, and make me laugh.

I wonder if Ruby the cat will pull a cracker with me?

16 comments:

Joanna St. James said...

ha ha that was hilarious maybe u should wait for the girlies to get home so they can have a proper princess/office party with you.
Merry Christmas India - you do really good work, and I shall be writing a letter of recommendation to your boss :-)

Morton S Gray said...

Merry Christmas! Hope the office party went well ;-) Mx

wannabe a writer said...

Hi India

Hope you enjoy your office party. I'd go the whole hog and crack open the Quality Street - you know you want to!

Catherine J said...

Deposited husband at rather lovely Italian restaurant for his office party earlier, and will no doubt be summoned to provide taxi service again later - so I'm very happy to have happened in on your Christmas soup bash. Should I don high heels and reindeer antlers in your honour? Perhaps I'll just wish you a Happy Christmas and duck out again. Cx

Caroline said...

Hi India - just popping over to say how much I enjoyed "Her Last Night of Innocence". (I loved your dedication to MS as well- I'm always a sucker for a good dedication.) Caroline x

ros said...

I'll pull a cracker with you! Okay, I'm wearing the purple paper hat but you can keep the plastic screwdriver. Now then, the joke:

Why does Santa's helper see the therapist?

Because he suffers from low elf esteem.

Now finish off that wine, but be careful not to photocopy any body parts and email them to your boss, okay?

India said...

*very proud face* Gosh, thanks Joanna! And I don't want those girlies at my party, turning their noses up at my lovely soup and scoffing all the mince pies. They wouldn't understand all the office in-jokes between Ruby and me anyway. Merry Christmas to you too! (you have told your mother-in-law to lay a place at the table for me, haven't you?)

Thanks Morton. The wine had gone off a bit, but Ruby's not a drinker so at least I didn't have to share the inch with anyone. And the speeches were short, but really, really good. And no-one sat on the photocopier and passed the results around, or vomited in the wastepaper basket, so I think we can call it a success!

Ahh wannabe (can I re-christen you 'Am A Writer'?)Tragically I don't have a tin of Quality Street. But I did have 3 chocolate-covered brazil nuts from the bag in the car on the way up to pick up #3 so I can't complain too much.

Oh Catherine, you arrived just as the party was finishing, but thanks for taking the trouble with the antlers and high heels. Better take them off now though, incase the drunken senior partners in your husband's firm mistake you for the Christmas Kissogram when you go to pick him up later...

Caroline, I love you for saying that - thanks so much. The insecurity over that book never goes away! x

India said...

Ha - Ros, I missed you there! And if someone else had to bring up unmentionable acts with the photocopier it would be you, madam. But thanks for the plastic screwdriver, and I'll be using your joke many times over the festive season! (and passing it off as my own, of course...)

Jane said...

You would be the life of the office party. I would pull a cracker for you. My cousin's neighbors are from Australia and they always bring crackers over for us to pop. Merry Christmas, India.

Rachel Lyndhurst said...

Sod! I missed the party!

Did anyone photcopy their bottom this time?

Lots of love,

Rach.
XX

Brigitte said...

Darn, I love mince pies. Don't get them around here much.
Did you eat them all, or are there any left?!
No, thought not. Ah well, next time.

Stay warm and snug. I've had a horrible encounter with Mr Snow and Mr Ice yesterday - on my way to the Riding centre, of all places - fetching my daughter; no drama, mind you, but could have done without it.

Had to park the car and continue on foot as I couldn't get up the slope to my house.
Shouldn't complain, though, it's worse in the UK.

Oh, nearly forgot: your books are GREAT, as is your Blog.
You can get out the bubbly now.
x

India said...

Aw Jane, thanks. I love parties unless I'm responsible for hosting them when I turn into a kind of obsessive, Monica-from-Friends type person and end up weeping into my apron in the kitchen because I forgot to take the mini bruscetta bites out of the oven. But an office party would really be my kind of thing - wouldn't it be fab if we really could have one, with all the blog regulars from all over the world? What about you - are you always at the centre of the action at a party, or do you sneak off to the kitchen for quiet conversation? I'd love to know!

Ah Rachel, here you are, we've been waiting for you. Photocopier's over there, love...

Brigitte, can't believe you're in a mince pie-free zone - I would have sent some to you if I'd known! What do you have in Paris instead? (And Joanna, if you're reading this - what about in Corsica??) Glad you're safe after your horrible ice incident, but I have to ask how Mr B is? Hope in not too much pain, and that you all have a lovely, lovely Christmas. It's a bit early(9am) to open the bubbly now, but in about 9 hours perhaps...

Will raise a glass to you all! xxxx

Kaz19 said...

Hi, well I have a terrible admission to tell everyone.
It was our office party last Friday, we started at 1pm, and finished at I'm not sure what time!
Imagine if you can, mixing white wine with vodka, drinking it liberally for 6 hours? I became the party cabaret, from dancing with flower vases on my head, to falling flat on my back, while trying to dance to Wham's White Christmas!..
When I got into the office yesterday morning, it's all everybody were talking about. I will never live it down. I am so embarassed. If one person said, 'If you can't do it at Christmas, when can you do it?' Oh God, never again.
If you knew me, you would never be able to put the person I was last Friday, with the person I normally am, honest!
All I can say, I blame the free bar, they forced me to drink that wine on the table, I couldn't let it go to waste could I?
Happy Christmas to everyone, and thanks India for giving us lovely hero's and heroine's to enjoy.
xx Karen

India said...

Karen, that would make a perfect opening chapter in an M&B, don't you think, with the sweet, lovely heroine letting her hair down for once at the Christmas party and being all wild and wicked... Are you sure there weren't any billionaire tycoons around?! Anyway, if there was a free bar I'm prepared to bet that everyone else was pretty much in the same state, so don't take any notice of the comments. Hope your head wasn't too sore the next day, and that the party was worth the hangover - so long as you had fun at the time that's all that matters!

Have a lovely Christmas xxx

Kaz19 said...

Hiya, yes everybody else was in the same state, thank God.
We did have a great time, what I remember of it, at least.
And yes there were a couple of millionaires in the room, ie. the owner of the company I work for, but he's spoken for, so we won't go there.
Opening chapter for an M&B? Umm, let me think, my memory is still a bit blurred, could be. The whole night certainly made my colleagues laugh, so perhaps.
Happy Christmas everyone.
xx Karen

Brigitte said...

Yes, unfortunately mince-pie free zone since M&S decided to leave Paris a few years back and regroup across the Channel. What were they thinking, I'm asking you?!

The French are into "Bûche de Noël" served over the festive season. It's a cake in the form of a log made out of choc, chestnut, exotic fruit, pear mousse, or a combination of flavours AND covered in chocolate, exotic fruit or vanilla icing; does wonders to your waistline!!!
Needless to say that it is served AFTER the goose, or turkey... not to forget the cheese, just before the Bûche...
Yes yes, been there....done that :)

I'm more into German Christmas nibbles like Christstollen (dried fruit cake with marzipan), Spekulatius (biscuits), Printen (ginger bread covered - or not- in chocolate or, my absolute favourite, almond slivers AND chocolate;
I think both countries don't have to envy each other in their capacity of expanding people's waistline!!!!

As for the office party with all the other bloggers...I'm game!
And as you've asked, I'm the sneak-off-to-the-kitchen-for-a-quiet-conversation type of person. It's the only way to get something meaningful across. When it's too animated I can't hear myself think!!

Mr B. has had a terrible first week, but the pain is getting less acute now.
Thanks for asking.

Lovely Christmas to all. x